We are barely into January and, already many of those New Years resolutions will have been abandoned, along with the gift wrap. All of the intentions to eat less, get fit, stop drinking which were made in good faith are no more.
If it's this tough sticking to a good intention, what can be done to help? Is there a magic answer? How can I stick to my New Year resolutions?
I spent years being addicted to chocolate. By this, I don't mean that I would over indulge now and again. I used chocolate to satisfy a craving deep inside. it wasn't luxury chocolate either, it was cheap mass produced stuff and lots of it in one session. I'm not sure how I avoided becoming diabetic but this binge behaviour overrode all of my usual common sense and logic. The battles of will I used to go through every single time.
This inner conflict is not only draining but unresourceful and it is nearly impossible to consciously talk yourself out of doing the thing you hate yourself for doing. You will continually experience an internal bargaining process going on , which is incredibly disempowering.
After one ugly incident in Ikea car park, involving me and a family bag of Revels, I decided I couldn't go on like this. I felt sad, beaten and so angry with myself and the rest of the world. It felt unfair and there seemed no way out. The doctor didn't take this behaviour seriously and there didn't seem to be any who understood how bad this made me feel. It was a secretive business too, so most people didn't know what was going on.
I turned to NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) coaching and it was like a lightbulb had switched on! For the first time ever, I was able to address this part of me which used to spin out of control. This part which I would never have openly admitted to having, as the rest of me was so level headed.
This was the first time that I learned about what makes us tick. I learned about the internal messaging we feed ourselves and how we can change the script. As fantastical as NLP seems, it works!
I found that, when I was feeling threatened or under stress, I turned to eating chocolate. After digging deep in my mind, I found another way to manage the stress triggers.
Acknowledging that you can have different parts or personal incongruences deep inside your mind, will begin a journey of getting the results you want!
If you want to improve your chances of sticking to your resolutions then read on.
- Respect that the negative part of your mind is doing its job.
- Stop beating yourself up.
- List all of the words describing the purpose of your negative part. What is it trying to achieve for you? This may seem silly, but go with it! Keep going until you have the highest purpose gained by your behaviour. (mine was calm, security)
- Opposite this, list all of the words describing the purpose of your positive part. The 'how you'd like to be' part What is it trying to achieve for you? Keep going until you have the highest purpose gained by your behaviour. (mine was calm, security)
- As you look at your words, allow yourself time to process your feelings. You will find that each part of your mind is driving you towards the same outcome.
- Now you can begin to understand what both parts of you are trying to achieve!
How can I stick to my New Years resolutions? The answer is so simple. Choose which parts intention you want to use and go with it. Once you know how to do this, it is so simple, yet so effective.
To get a snap shot of how lucrative the slimming business is, there are some mind boggling numbers in this link. It hasn't become a massive global business by helping you stick to your resolutions.
If you'd like a call about how NLP Coaching can help you free yourself from repeat negative behaviour, get in touch.
HAPPY NEW YEARS SUCCESS WITH YOUR RESOLUTIONS