Is guilt holding you back from living your best life?
Most of us feel guilty at some points in our life, it's part of being human. This can be a feeling of mild guilt or that heart gripping, head throbbing, keeping you awake at night, kind of guilt. It's often disproportionate with the thing you're feeling guilty about although this wont make you feel any better about yourself.
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You've hurt someone's feelings and you're feeling guilty.
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You're doing something for yourself and its not sitting comfortably with you.
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You feel that you are in a privileged position and you're feeling uneasy.
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You've acted dishonestly and it's staying with you.
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Your actions caused unhappiness with others.
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You are having negative thoughts about someone close to you.
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You've made a life choice which negatively impacts on those people close to you.
Hanging on to guilt does absolutely nothing to improve the situation. Struggling to deal with the negative feelings it brings, can lead to believing the worst type of negative stuff about yourself.
- Experiencing a lack of self worth
- Being defensive and distant with those close to you
- Struggling to cope with stress and anxiety
- with self doubt
- Being judgemental and unforgiving with yourself and others
- Afraid to move forward and try again
- Having a head full of unresolved issues
- Feeling resentful and hostile towards others
None of the above is good for you, so how about letting go?
Your conscious mind will be telling you all of the logical stuff, such as getting over the guilt or not allowing yourself to be affected by it so much. Your unconscious mind however is crammed with all of your deeply held values and beliefs. It is this stash which needs to be unravelled and set free.
"No amount of guilt can change the past and no amount of worrying can change the future" Umar ibn Al-Khattab
So can you really get rid of your guilt and if so how?
NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) is a set of models and techniques useful in helping understand how each thought can influence your actions and outcomes. Everything you believe is arranged in a particular order in your mind and is used to form the decisions which lead to your actions.
When your mind is holding on to negative thoughts, this will have strong pull on the way you decide how to try and deal with a feeling. The feeling may not be comfortable but it is familiar, and we do love a bit of familiarity. Letting go of familiarity means change and we're not brilliant at change!
So how do you start to make the change?
It begins with a good deep dive into what is important to you in life and your core values. These values form the foundation of your belief system and support each thought you have about what is right and wrong.
This quiz will help you to start thinking about your values.
- What is important to you in life?
- If you could choose any career without constraint, what would it be?
- What in the news angers you?
- What are you most proud of?
- When are you at your happiest? (what is present & what is absent?)
- When are you most ashamed? (what is present & what is absent?)
As you're working through your answers, try thinking about that guilt you're carrying. Where does it fit with your answers?
If you'd like to ditch your guilt, Time Line Therapy® is probably the most rapid and effective way of moving you forward. In just one session, you will be transported from your place of guilt to your new place of freedom. Whats not to like?
If you'd like help to ditch your guilt and move on, why not book a free discovery call?
Jules x