I offer bereavement coaching and carer support coaching to clients who have reached a place where they are stuck with feelings which for one reason or another are emotionally damaging to them. There is an expectation which we place upon ourselves to feel and say the right thing about someone we are caring for or have lost. The problem with this is that any underlying negative feelings we have do not just go away. Feelings of resentment shame anger guilt and frustration all knot together to seriously impact on our quality of life.
When we are bereft there is an expectation that we will somehow eventually get over our loss and move on. Family and friends can start to show impatience that we are still struggling a long time after the bereavement. There is a sense of anger and injustice too when the person has been bad towards us and their memory is exhalted by others into someone we don't recognise. This only adds to our feelings of frustration and makes our lives even more miserable.
The sense of being stuck in a miserable place is made even worse when we are harbouring feelings of resentment about the person we have lost. Chronic serious illness,terminal illness or death can rob us of the opportunity to try and make repairs to an unhappy relationship with ourselves and those we have lost,
Clients come to me to find peace, tranquillity and closure. They want to learn how to cope with life better and don't know how to get out of their feelings of despair. Quite often they have turned to medication to help them numb the emotional pain. They frequently suffer from insomnia, anxiety and feelings of stress. They may be eating or drinking unhelpfully and medicated or smoking.
I enable clients to have the opportunity to explore and express their innermost feelings about themselves and the person they are caring for or have lost. This may be the first time they have ever been able to say how they truly feel.
This release work opens the way for a truly enlightening journey and one which is highly recommended for people who are struggling to cope in the aftermath of bereavement or while caring for a loved one.
We all need natural levels of fear in order to survive. Walking across a busy road should quite reasonably cause a level of fear to kick in and help us to get across safely. In the natural state of our development we learn how to be cautious as we grow and develop. When things go wrong with our experiences and interpretation of events, our fears and phobias start to kick in. These fears and phobias then take hold and throw us out of control. We start avoiding situations which may cause us to confront our fears which in turn can be really frustrating. Longing to fly for a deserved holiday but not being able to get on that plane. Sitting by a pool while friends and family enjoy splashing around because we fear the water. Avoidance techniques become embedded in your daily routine and in themselves can cause panic and stress. People who are suffering from these debilitating symptoms quite often cannot even explain how the fear or phobia started. All they know is that they are unable to do things which may cause them to face their worst fears. In extreme cases people can become housebound as they struggle to get on top of these very real but totally irrational fears.
These fears and phobias are very real and very frightening to the person experiencing them. They can be conquered using a combination of hypnotherapy and NLP to eradicate them.
You may be finding that you don’t put yourself forward for that longed for promotion at work. Going out on a date may be impossible even though you really want to meet a special someone. Feelings that you are being constantly overlooked when anything nice happens often leads to further crushing your confidence. Looking in the mirror and hating what you see is a common symptom of low self esteem. Eating the wrong foods or drinking excessively leads to reinforcing these feelings as the buzz wears off and you are left feeling even more low. You may be feeling that you just aren’t good enough as your confidence sinks lower still. Poor self image is both destructive and exhausting as you struggle to gain control over these negative feelings.
You will gain confidence and improve your esteem with a combination of hypnotherapy and NLP techniques. You will see yourself in a completely new positive and liberating way.
You may be reaching for the biscuit tin without thinking or pouring one too many glasses of wine each day. Carrying around excessive weight leads to poor health and can seriously harm self confidence. Health issues can kick in as you light another cigarette or use recreational drugs. The body responds to these unnatural ‘highs and lows’ by craving more stimulants. These stimulants then raise the anxiety levels and this constant stress causes the mind to seek calm where there is none. Sleep becomes interrupted and insomnia can drain your energy to a point where getting out of bed becomes impossible and you wake up each morning tired and irritable. This cycle of behaviour is very frightening to the individual and sometimes can become dangerous as the levels of stimulation escalate.
Caring for a very sick or dying loved one is emotionally draining and you will often find that you suppress the things you want to say for fear of causing more pain. This is a dilemma so may people find themselves in and there doesn't seem to be any outlet for the frustrations and anxiety you are dealing with. There is a real tendency for you to become invisible as seemingly the whole world concerns itself with the patient. Not being able to say what you really feel only adds to the stress and any resentment you may have built filters down into your subconscious and sits there festering. Guilt adds to the mental turmoil which in turn adds to the anxiety and erodes your self esteem.
If you think you need to talk to a therapist, I will work with you and help you to see and express yourself in a more positive way. You will be free to say what you really feel and just be yourself. You will benefit from hypnosis and NLP to knock down those debilitating thoughts and make way for new positivity. Breathing out all of the toxic anxiety and breathing in fresh new thinking will leave you feeling calmer and in control again.
If you are suffering from anxiety and panic attacks, you will probably be finding some aspects of life very difficult. Going out in company may prove to be too difficult and being in public may cause your stress levels to soar. Breathing properly may become an issue and can lead to feelings of faintness and dizziness as your mind races to try and control these with unhelpful thoughts. Sometimes you will be feeling completely overwhelmed by the world and out of control. You will probably not be sleeping properly and waking each day feeling tired and debilitated.
If you think you need to talk to a therapist, I will help you overcome anxiety issues and panic overload by using safe trusted hypnotherapy and total relaxation. You will be able to relax, learn how to breathe therapeutically and so importantly you will see a cleared way forward.
“Sometimes the strongest women are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about”. - Anon